Something I found in my own first post-pandemic travel last spring was that I didn’t like it anymore. I used to love travelling - anticipation, that liminal space, I even love packing! But when I came home, even though I’d had fun! My first thought was “thank god, I’m never getting in a plane again.” While that’s unlikely, it does speak to the blind spot of familiarity: after an absence of going anywhere, I’m no longer willing to put up with many of the things we’ve included as part of long haul travel, involving a plane. Security? Wait times? Needing to be extremely early? The liquid bag for carry on? I hated it all. It felt pointless and grating, not the price to pay for adventure. And these negative transit experiences unfortunately overshadowed my trip because they’re what I remember the most, even though at the time, I wasn’t that hung up on them.
Nov 16, 2022·edited Nov 16, 2022Liked by Mark Dykeman
Years ago, when I was also travelling a lot for work, I purchased noise cancelling headphones. An expensive accoutrement, they proved their worth while flying by giving me a quiet space inside my head that blocked out all the noise and commotion around me, particularly while flying. Sometimes, I would even put them on while reading to give me that silence that is otherwise unattainable in a cabin full of other passengers. I still have those expensive noise cancelling headphones, as archaic as they seem now with their quaint wire that no longer fits into my iPhone. Sometimes I use them for listening to things on my iPad - which still has a headphone jack - just for nostalgia. ;-)
Having just finished a final edit pass on a book which I'm about to publish, I fully agree with all of the above. :) I wrote the original draft in 2020, and having that distance has proved invaluable. It's also the first time I've edited a print proof of the manuscript, which also shifted it away from that familiarity and helped me to catch a lot of basic typos that might otherwise have snuck past.
Exceptional post, Mark. I began reading last week and knew I should wait to give it my full attention!
“...the conflict between the need to maintain personal bonds and the need for new experiences.”
Earlier this year I traveling to see my son who lived hundreds of miles away. I told my husband I was going...alone. I needed the time to 1)remind myself that I was capable of traveling alone (something I had not done since before the pandemic), and 2)to have some solitude. It rejuvenated me.
Then in August, I drove over five hours to stay with my brother for three weeks post stem cell transplant. It wasn’t a long distance, by any means, but it was the longest I had been away from home in a very long time. I was thankful to get back!
And just last week I found writer’s block dissipated when I drove into the office an hour away. I work from home and rarely have the drive time I used to enjoy. It’s time with your thoughts since you can’t scroll while driving (well, some fools do...). I don’t care for podcasts, so it’s me, the radio, and my thoughts. I don’t really like taking voice notes, but I found myself starting one to capture all the great ideas forming in my head on that drive.
There is something about travel--indeed! I’ll keep this in mind as I travel by car a couple of times during the next week.
“Air travel can provide a magic interlude when you are between cares and can focus on something of your choosing”--this is what I used to love about traveling. Airports and planes felt like this alternate universe where you were almost unreachable and gloriously absolved of responsibility. Plane cancelled and have to miss work the next day? Oh well, what can you do? Now that everyone has smartphones and even planes have wifi, it feels a little less magical in that sense.
What I used to love about travel were the unexpected moments of connection that often began with arrival at the airport. I used to look forward to flying but now it holds nothing but gritted teeth behind my mask which I will probably always wear in airports or on planes. The only travel I've done since the pandemic is a trip from the West Coast to the East Coast for my dad's funeral last September, long postponed due to Covid, which also killed him. The time with my family and in New England was worth everything it took to get there and to heal.
My husband and I traveled often before that, usually to Italy and other parts of Europe. We talk about going again and I long to be there in some ways, but the thought of getting there is so much more fraught.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and mine, interesting read. The blind spots, the fresh eyes, no doubt contribute to the tug on the heart strings when I get home. You remember anew all the things you easily forget or take for granted.
It’s funny that you felt it was personal vs professional travel - I’m curious as to why? I’d say it’s been about a 60/40 split for professional travel...but regardless of my reason for leaving, I feel the same every time :)
I don't seem to be capable of work or reflection on airplanes. Tried to write on airplane quite a few times and it doesn't seem to work that well, and I think enough sitting around at home, plus hard to think when a baby is screaming for the entire flight.
The bit about familiarity, especially with editing, is something I'e also found to be true. Though when uploading on a schedule it can be hard to create that distance. And it's strange what you can miss in a familiar place once that familiarity makes you less observant.
Great article. I've always said that a key benefit to travel is perspective, and this essay elaborates on that in several different ways.
Pre-pandemic, we would travel to Europe multiple times per year. We've not yet resumed that habit, but I think when we do, it will be a different experience -- not only has the world changed, but I'm sure we have too.
I used to work for Marriott and Ritz Carlton. Traveling was a lot more affordable at $29 a night for Marriotts and once in a blue moon the employee rate would be available at a Ritz.
Since those days I use mostly hostels and I have to say I like it more. It forces this introvert to be more social and not just stay in because holy cow this is an expensive room normally so I better soak it all in back in the Ritz days.
I will admit I do really miss the Japanese toto bidet toilets though. Heaven. TMI?
Something I found in my own first post-pandemic travel last spring was that I didn’t like it anymore. I used to love travelling - anticipation, that liminal space, I even love packing! But when I came home, even though I’d had fun! My first thought was “thank god, I’m never getting in a plane again.” While that’s unlikely, it does speak to the blind spot of familiarity: after an absence of going anywhere, I’m no longer willing to put up with many of the things we’ve included as part of long haul travel, involving a plane. Security? Wait times? Needing to be extremely early? The liquid bag for carry on? I hated it all. It felt pointless and grating, not the price to pay for adventure. And these negative transit experiences unfortunately overshadowed my trip because they’re what I remember the most, even though at the time, I wasn’t that hung up on them.
Years ago, when I was also travelling a lot for work, I purchased noise cancelling headphones. An expensive accoutrement, they proved their worth while flying by giving me a quiet space inside my head that blocked out all the noise and commotion around me, particularly while flying. Sometimes, I would even put them on while reading to give me that silence that is otherwise unattainable in a cabin full of other passengers. I still have those expensive noise cancelling headphones, as archaic as they seem now with their quaint wire that no longer fits into my iPhone. Sometimes I use them for listening to things on my iPad - which still has a headphone jack - just for nostalgia. ;-)
Having just finished a final edit pass on a book which I'm about to publish, I fully agree with all of the above. :) I wrote the original draft in 2020, and having that distance has proved invaluable. It's also the first time I've edited a print proof of the manuscript, which also shifted it away from that familiarity and helped me to catch a lot of basic typos that might otherwise have snuck past.
Exceptional post, Mark. I began reading last week and knew I should wait to give it my full attention!
“...the conflict between the need to maintain personal bonds and the need for new experiences.”
Earlier this year I traveling to see my son who lived hundreds of miles away. I told my husband I was going...alone. I needed the time to 1)remind myself that I was capable of traveling alone (something I had not done since before the pandemic), and 2)to have some solitude. It rejuvenated me.
Then in August, I drove over five hours to stay with my brother for three weeks post stem cell transplant. It wasn’t a long distance, by any means, but it was the longest I had been away from home in a very long time. I was thankful to get back!
And just last week I found writer’s block dissipated when I drove into the office an hour away. I work from home and rarely have the drive time I used to enjoy. It’s time with your thoughts since you can’t scroll while driving (well, some fools do...). I don’t care for podcasts, so it’s me, the radio, and my thoughts. I don’t really like taking voice notes, but I found myself starting one to capture all the great ideas forming in my head on that drive.
There is something about travel--indeed! I’ll keep this in mind as I travel by car a couple of times during the next week.
“Air travel can provide a magic interlude when you are between cares and can focus on something of your choosing”--this is what I used to love about traveling. Airports and planes felt like this alternate universe where you were almost unreachable and gloriously absolved of responsibility. Plane cancelled and have to miss work the next day? Oh well, what can you do? Now that everyone has smartphones and even planes have wifi, it feels a little less magical in that sense.
What I used to love about travel were the unexpected moments of connection that often began with arrival at the airport. I used to look forward to flying but now it holds nothing but gritted teeth behind my mask which I will probably always wear in airports or on planes. The only travel I've done since the pandemic is a trip from the West Coast to the East Coast for my dad's funeral last September, long postponed due to Covid, which also killed him. The time with my family and in New England was worth everything it took to get there and to heal.
My husband and I traveled often before that, usually to Italy and other parts of Europe. We talk about going again and I long to be there in some ways, but the thought of getting there is so much more fraught.
We’re holding off travel by flight until at least fall of 2023. For us right now the hassle outweighs the enjoyment of flying.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and mine, interesting read. The blind spots, the fresh eyes, no doubt contribute to the tug on the heart strings when I get home. You remember anew all the things you easily forget or take for granted.
It’s funny that you felt it was personal vs professional travel - I’m curious as to why? I’d say it’s been about a 60/40 split for professional travel...but regardless of my reason for leaving, I feel the same every time :)
I don't seem to be capable of work or reflection on airplanes. Tried to write on airplane quite a few times and it doesn't seem to work that well, and I think enough sitting around at home, plus hard to think when a baby is screaming for the entire flight.
The bit about familiarity, especially with editing, is something I'e also found to be true. Though when uploading on a schedule it can be hard to create that distance. And it's strange what you can miss in a familiar place once that familiarity makes you less observant.
Great article. I've always said that a key benefit to travel is perspective, and this essay elaborates on that in several different ways.
Pre-pandemic, we would travel to Europe multiple times per year. We've not yet resumed that habit, but I think when we do, it will be a different experience -- not only has the world changed, but I'm sure we have too.
I used to work for Marriott and Ritz Carlton. Traveling was a lot more affordable at $29 a night for Marriotts and once in a blue moon the employee rate would be available at a Ritz.
Since those days I use mostly hostels and I have to say I like it more. It forces this introvert to be more social and not just stay in because holy cow this is an expensive room normally so I better soak it all in back in the Ritz days.
I will admit I do really miss the Japanese toto bidet toilets though. Heaven. TMI?